Esther's Fantasy

MY BROTHER

2006-05-25T06:08:00.000-07:00

Ms Pauline was laughing at my ONE entry in the yearly archive, but I guess that shows you how diligent I am with regards to things like this.

I guess I am in the "blogging" mode, or rather the "paying tribute" mode? No no no... I think it's the " invigilation fever"... perhaps, who knows?

I've never written about my brother. Standing at 1.89CM, this lanky handsome brother of mine is 2 years younger than me.. 18 months to be precise. I always think that Aaron has been ENDOWED with all the great attitubutes; the looks ( thats why I have to choose an ugly photo of him to accentuate my "beauty", giggle) , the musical talents, the intelligence. If there is one thing I can say about him, he has Great People skills. He just seems to have this magical power to attract the young and old alike to him. I must say in this area, he is 100 times better than his often-than-not chaokuan sister.

Aaron is a typical S guy that you meet, polar extreme to his I. D sister. Being so close in age means we fight our way growing up. Trust me, when it comes to fight, his S-ness is never exhibited on his sister. Well as a testament to this, the most recent incident was when he threw my HP last sunday on my parents' bed for some silly reason that i can't even remember, and OF COURSE I have to retaliate by throwing his HP back at him... well I reckon his being a newer HP, he has more to lose haha. Its kinda unbelievable to imagine a 27-year old and a 25-year old TEACHERS acting like their Ah Beng students. But that's always been the dynamics that we share.. never truly expressive, subtle in many ways, yet loving one another in our special way.As we grow older, we learnt to appreciate and enjoy each other in many ways.

I'm so blessed to have Aaron as my brother. If given a choice to choose among million babies once again, I would still have chosen him.

100 Reasons why I love my Brother

He is good looking

He is ever so considerate to his family

He is a man that loves God

He has such a BIG heart for Young People

He can play great songs on his guitar

He's witty

He's adventurous

He's full of "weird" ideas

He makes decision for me when I can't

He's someone I can trust when I need a shoulder to weep on

He irritates me quite a fair bit haha

He shares the same surname as me

And simply because...

He's my BRO

Hey aaron, If you are reading this, mushy as it seems, you truly have been an amazing brother :) Think twice before you throw my Hp again next time

TRIBUTE

2006-05-24T21:50:00.000-07:00

What happened when you are super-boreeeeed during invigilation?
You blog.

Had a interesting conversation with one of my member the other day. We were talking about having Fun. .. simply FUN. Well actually, the context was i was "admonishing"her for spending just a tad too much time on her softball... which no doubt is her passion ,when she should have being focusing on her second year dentistry work. She "lamented" about how boring microbioogy is (which i think i would have been bored to tears too), how tiring lectures can be at times, the long academic hours... etc.

I always believe that FUN and WORK should not be mutually exclusive. I'm sure you can find some fun in all the dental labwork? I mean drilling on dummies, creating dentures, meeting weird patients etc.... isnt that FUN? The point is, we can derive JOY in what we are doing =)

But the whole conversation with her got me thinking.
I'm so blessed to be a person that LOVE my work.
I wake up at 630am every morning, eagerly wanting to go to school. Well believe it or not, i find myself looking at the clock at times at 1230am in the morning, thinking... hmmm sigh another 6 more hours before the next day dawns. (Perverted as it seems... hey but that's honestly how i feel)

I love being ALIVE.

But I must say, i am truly BLESSED because of all the wonderful colleagues that I have, I love you guys to pieces.

This is for YOU.

Boss: You are the MAN behind this wonderful school we call our Home.
Your drive and endless creative ideas never cease to astound me. Sometimes I do think I'm so far behind, chasing after the dust of your "thinking machine". Your vision is one of the most important reason why I would give my energy and youth to the school. You are simply amazing. And oh not forgetting all the "little dances" in the staff room that keeps us all highly energized and charged. Thank you so much.

Jelaine: My long-time-Nanyang- schoolmate- turned- colleague. I always remember you years back, standing on the old rickety Nanyang stage with Tian Tian, defending the student council. I mean.. wow that takes courage! You are a very important lady to us. And of course, apart from the fact that our year end bonuses and increment hinges on your "contribution of love" (*giggle), your ability to handle STRESS is worth me saluting. Thanks for working so hard. Love you !

Alison: The "mother" of the department. What would we ever do without you? You are a God sent administrator. Seriously, if i'm you, i would have "slaughtered" all the teachers 100X already for missing so many deadlines. (Thats why i'm not the adminitrator mah). Your organizing skills keep us going. Thanks!

Jeremy: The man wearing many "hats". What would we ever do without you, LAB TECH cum FACILITIES OFFICER cum IT MAN cum SECURITY GUY? Thanks for putting up with all our whining... esp mine. You are such an important man. And hmmm, my laptop seems to run abit too slow recently, you wanna come and take a look? Thanks heaps!

Peng-Ge: AKA xiao-fy's boyfriend AKA "dai yi Long". You are such a GENTLE man for the role. But welcome to our team this year! Because of you, Jeremy has finally graduated from the overwhelming sisters' fellowship to find a man he can call "heng dai".

CS: Mr KOH, how can the teachers ever do without you? You are always so cool, so poise, so calm, so reassuring, so loving towards the students. Your can-do attitude never cease to amaze me. You are an amazingly amazing DM. Truly appreciate you.

Tiffany aka xiao-fy: Did I ever tell you I find you an amazing person? I mean you have to be right... to graduate from computer science and yet teach geography, to be so creative and so hmmm IT not-savy? Hehehe. But that aside, fyfy you are a wonderful friend and colleague in the office, I will always remember your thoughtful gestures in the most difficult times. Thanks for your love. MUACKS!

Selena: You are a POWER GAL! You always seem to have endless energy and love to dispense to all the students. Your passion and drive for your work needs no other proof. No wonder you are the students favourite!

Yvonne: Though you are the new kid on the block, but your love and passion for students is inspirational. Thanks for rekindling and reminding me of what it means and takes to be part of CHEC :)

Sally: JUNIOR ah, senior needs to educate you, must be nice and polite to senior, where you find good senior like me? you go elsewhere and ask... wait long long ah. Hehe, Sally its been a joy to have you, a fellow Malaysian in the office, great to know that I'm not alone. Looking forward to see you at your wedding... soon! I will only say this ONCE, hmm i actually quite like having you around, you have been a blessing!

Pauline: aka Jiang Bao Ling. You are so small and petite on the outside, but truly a woman of GREAT capacity on the inside. Thanks for being more than a colleague but a faithful and endearing friend.. esp when I'm in those stressful chaokuan mode. You are very much appreciated.

Annie and Clara: The powerful duo behind the English Dept!

Annie: Hello mother-to-be, you simply amaze me by your "playful"and adventurous spirit. the office is never a dull place with you around. Before i forget... can you please for goodness sake NAME your baby!.. love ya

Clara: What else can I say? You are the MOST THOUGHTFUL and CONSIDERATE colleague around. Sincerely from my heart, I do admire you. (Hey, for those who are thinking otherwise, i'm straight...). You are ever so patient, so loving even under the most impossible situation, I can only say, you are a God Sent Gift from Heaven! Thanks for everything.

Sidenote: can I give you my birthday wish list in advance?

Jasmine: You are so "childlike" (not childish ok) in so many things, so full of faith and yet having such a sweet and humble spirit. I love you for just being you. You have brought much much joy to the office. Thanks

Joli: The Maths genius that always hide behind your cubicle. Initially I thought you are a very serious person... boy was I wrong? The fun side of you is simply hmmmm... breathtaking? ( sorry chers, ran out of vocab). Woman of great ability, walk out of your cubicle more and get a life with all of us ok? You are a GREAT addition to the team.

Chye Siang: I nearly forgot about you! Of course not. You are such a positive person that you never fail to brighten my day. It's hard to sulk when you have such an encouraging colleague around. Jia you jia you.. 6 months more of SOT and you will graduate!

Lisha: You are a wonderful combination, our reception counter cant survive A DAY without you!Thanks for always being so willing, so helpful and best of all, always putting a smile on our faces. Love you lots!

Phew... i've covered all finally...but these are the sincere words of my heart.
Its truly been a Great Joy serving God together with you all.

P/S : Xingni, if you are reading this, just want you to know, I look forward to see you graduate as a dental surgeon in a couple of years time. But, I want you to be HAPPY doing what God has called you to do. Love u!

随笔杂谈

2006-05-24T19:20:00.001-07:00

太久没有上这网站留言，以致连自个儿的网址也忘了。要不是我的“表嫂”还保留了这个网址，今天你可能无法窥探我内心的一些想法。为什么有如此多的感触呢？我也不晓得，只觉得偶尔也应该以不同的途径抒发自己的想法。

那天在课堂和学生上了一堂“孙中山与辛亥革命”史，给他们讲了一些晚清事迹：像慈禧太后垂帘听政、八国联军火烧圆明园、林则徐围剿鸦片厂的故事。。虽不知听者是否“有情”，但述者肯定“有意”。短短的45 分钟最大的满足，莫过于看到他们的眼睛“迸发智慧的光芒”！（哈哈，我想是我自己想太多，但是他们觉得很有趣是确实有的事情。）

席间，在黑板上写了几个方块字，迎来学生阵阵的惊讶声。。。

“老师，你居然会写中文字哦！”
这突如其来的“赞叹”还真让我有一些啼笑皆非。对一个中文系毕业生而言，我是否应该庆幸自己的英文水平还可以，还是华文水平太糟糕？=）我只能含笑回答。。。 “嗯，我的华文还可以啦”

其实我很怀念和中文为友的日子，那一堂课让我意识到我真的真的很喜欢中文。

我喜欢诗词、喜欢戏曲、喜欢话本、喜欢哲学。

上帝的安排有时真的很奇妙，我为何会在这里教历史呢？我也不知道。

最近常思索将来的去向，我应该何去何从？但最终的结论是。。。

上帝啊，启示我吧！

有个很可爱的朋友好心提示，干脆找个有钱人嫁入豪门，做个快乐的“太太”。

哈哈这种黄脸婆的日子还真是很不适合我。。。再说吧！

压力？？

2005-11-09T02:35:00.000-08:00

今天有人问我“压力”是什么？

我想了很久，不知道应该给她一个怎样的答案。
什么是压力呢？我想以前的我一定会说。。。。

压力是。。一大清早就被床头的小叮当可恶地“尖叫声”惊醒

压力是。。匆忙地走进洗手间想要换洗时才发现牙膏被之前可恶的“老弟”用完了

压力是。。远远地看到32号巴士，却在赶上之际望着它驰骋而去的背影

压力是。。该怎样讨好心仪的男生呢？

压力是。。批改一大堆不知所云、问不成句、句不成章的作文

压力是。。明知电视正播着最爱的韩剧，却还得卯足精神念书，心里却是恨得痒痒地
（纵然那只不过是一场在海滩上演生离死别的老掉牙情节）

压力是。。跑到Mango的大促销，却活生生地被一大堆莫名其妙地女人“排挤”在外，口中大呼“丑陋的新加坡人！”，眼睛却酸溜溜地直往里头调

压力是。。。不知道为什么要有压力

嘻嘻。。今天我终于明白什么是压力了！
压力是当周遭一切的一切向我施压时，我能淡定地躺在他的力量之中！（林前9：8）

朋友，我的回复你可否满意？？：〉

Bye Bye.. 我的方块朋友

2005-11-08T19:22:00.000-08:00

很喜欢用中文书写的感觉，怎么说中文系毕业生总不能连最基本的串写能力也不会吧？

系里的教授以前总是抱怨现在的中文系学生打字比写字还快，写一份报告嘛已经不再是“一气呵成”地将情感挥洒于文字间；而是把一大串的文字堆在文字处理机，按上几个黑键，这里剪一剪，那里贴一贴，在剪剪贴贴间就堆砌了一份报告。

但我很喜欢将一个个小小的方块字，用细腻地情感，慢慢地、细心地串联起来的感觉。怎么说呢。。。？那种感觉就像是小时候看着婆婆在炎热的午后，背着嗡嗡作响的老旧电扇，吹着热热的风，细心地剪着碎花布一样。一个、两个、三个。。。她就那样慢慢地、淡定地将一张张不起眼的碎花布剪成方块形，然后在一个小女孩昏昏沉沉的眼皮下，又魔术般地将好多好多的方块布，用粗粗的麻线变成一大张五颜六色的百结被。哇！。。。那种发自孩童纯真的赞叹，一直令人难忘。

孩提的感觉总是最直接的。可能因为这样，我总是对方方的中文字有着一份不可割舍的情感。。以至不顾家人反对，拥抱着它走过四年的大学生活。然而如今我要和伴随我多年的方块朋友说bye bye 了。尽管我内心有万般的不舍，但你总应该明白的，不是吗？？我一定会将你牢牢地记住，深信孩提存留的赞叹一定会挥之不去的。

若老教授知道我用文字处理机向方块朋友道别不知道会作何感受呢？

What A Day.... Amazing!

2005-11-07T20:54:00.000-08:00

I've received several complaints that i only have ONE entry to my blog.... to all those "complaining" pp out there, patience lah, it takes time for me to get used to this blogging mode.Though i might only have few entries, but its filled with WONDERFUL nuggets!

Woke up this morning at 530am, and made a fatal mistake of going back to sleep, only to wake up.. to my utter HORROR at 715am! I was Soooooooooo late, as i was supposed to meet my O Level Students at Serangoon Garden Sec School at 730am. Man i've never left the house in such a mad rush before. I was Soooooooo impressed that i managed to leave the house in 5 min time Vs my usual 1 hour preparation time. (i managed to leave the house only with my clothes on and my bag... MINUS: well blown hair, well make up face, accesories etc etc). It always under "extreme" time that we understand our true potential ie. that i can actually leave the house in 5 min. What a true saying!

I was so happy to see the CHEC students... i think my presence there did make a difference! I love them! Sending them off to the exam hall... i felt like a mother sending her 8 children to Battle. I mean, 10 months of preparation.. and its for a time as this, to take ONE PAPER! But i'm so proud of them, every single one, not daunted by the fact that they are private candidates, holding their heads up high even when pp throw them wierd glances...... hey guys, YOU ARE THE BEST!

But isnt God Great!? While i was on the cab today, i began to think of God and His Forgiveness. And more and more, i want to be like God... so full of grace and mercy, so ever ready to forgive and give us a second chance in life. Sending my students off today, i once again pondered on God's love, and prayed that i will always ALWAYS be a gracious and forgiving person. Just as how i felt towards my students, thats the way God feels about me. All the trials and tribulations, all the preparation, just for ONE MOMENT that i may REVEAL HIS GLORY!

I always share this story about Winston Churchill to my History Students.
Winston Churchill had always wanted and desired to be a politician. But his political career has never been smooth sailing... filled with ups and downs, being ousted in and out, pushed here and there. But the moment came when he was appointed Prime Minister of Britain during the WWII era. In his memoir, as he recalled, he spoke of the day when he walked down the red carpet to receive his appointment as PM, he said "it was as if my whole life was for a moment like this!" Winston Churchill lived to be one of the GREATEST WWII hero or our time.

Isnt God Great! I Love God more and more each day... And God, i will NEVER let go of YOU..

For the Forst Time...

2005-11-06T19:00:00.000-08:00

I've never liked the idea of Blogging... even put up a vehement argument against it in one of my class discussions. I mean who on earth will be nuts enough t post their "diary" on the web! But i just chanced upon my cousin-in-law's blog (who happend to be a beautiful 27-year old 4-moth- pregnant lady) and i was totally inspired...! I never knew she could write sooooooooooooo well, so expressive with her feelings..... and so creative. And i thought to myself... maybe i should really catch up with times! Oh well.. since i love writing so much, much as well put it into good use. My students and cg members have always complained that i'm a pretty private person, so now's the chance for you to take a little "peep" into my life, my thoughts, my feelings... and hopefully it will in little ways inspire you just as i was inspired. "Ordinary people can do Extraordinary things for God". I hope this will not be my first and last entry..*wink* haha
So enjoy it guys!

P/s: Peiting aka Kless... you trulyyyyyyyyyyyy inspired me!